August 24, 2012

WEGO Blog Carnival Day 4: "From Inside The Fishbowl"

NOTE: August 21-28 The Type1Rider Organization will be sharing our Sister Organizations (Blue Heel Society) Blog posts for the WEGO 'Advocate For Another' Blog Carnival.

Day 4 of the WEGO 'Advocating For Another' Blog Carnival I will use one of the 'Bonus Prompts' "From inside the fishbowl". People think they know what your life is like – but appearances can be deceiving. Write a paragraph about what your life looks like from the outside looking in – then write a paragraph about what it’s actually like from inside.

Looks certainly can be deceiving in our life with diabetes. In fact to anyone familiar with the struggles of addiction knows that the circle of destructive behavior is compared to insanity, and defined as "doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different (better) results". In that context, managing daily life with diabetes in our house is plain and simple insanity. Not only because doing so 24/7/365 can certainly make one insane, but we tend to do the same thing every day thinking that if we do what we did the last time it "worked", it will always "work" the same way...but it doesn't. Many think that because of my Advocacy work, and that after living with diabetes for almost two decades, we would have it down to an art. WRONG AGAIN! It just isn't that cut and dry. Some may also think that as a Caregiver and Husband together, the Care somehow flows from me the same way my everlasting and unconditional love does for my diabetic Wife. Not quite...

What is is really like from the inside is Caregiving & Love are usually not one in the same, especially when it comes to me 'suggesting' or 'advising' my favorite diabetic on how best to care for her condition and/or body. Especially if it is a change, modification, or complete overhaul of a task related to her care. I may have been educated about every aspect possible of diabetes care, but that doesn't always mean I am ready, willing, and able to confront what needs to happen in our diabetes care, especially when there is pain involved, physical or otherwise. As a Caregiver, I may know what needs to happen. As a Husband, I am many times a bumbling idiot that cannot see the forest through the trees. For that matter, my Wife gives more care to ME & her disabled Father that lives with us and she takes care of, than I could possibly give back. In a nutshell, this combination of living with a medical condition that could kill at any time, trying to be the best Husband, Caregiver & Advocate all at the same time, isn't fun, easy or boring.

May I leave you with an example of how insane I can get. While putting together this Blog post, I keep wondering if fish can be diabetic, and just how many carbs there are in Fish Food...