Training Hours: Ride: 03:17 Run: 00:00 Other: 00:00

Insulin Delivery Summary:
Daily Total: 45.50 units
Basal: 24.00u (53%)
Bolus: 21.50u (47%)

Daily Carb Intake Bolused For: 163g

As most of you who follow this blog know, 2011 has been a year of great joy and bitter defeats for me.

At the end, I am still standing, still breathing, and much happier than ever before.  Clearer in thought.  More focused.  More conscious of living each and every day to the fullest - not just saying it.

Doing it.

For the last and final day of 2011 I thought I would get out and enjoy the 65 degree temps and put some miles on the bike to put the final shovel fulls of dirt on this year.

2011 had one last gasp before being put to bed.

It was an interesting day diabetes and ride timing wise.  I set my temp basal to the usual 60% reduction at 11:38.  I was running a BG of 160, so I bolused only 1/2 of the suggested amount, knowing I was getting on the bike.

When I was getting on the bike at 12:57, my BG was up at 306.  Odd.  Could have been a lot of things... being 20 minutes late getting on the bike at the temp rate.  Lunch time snack.  The 1/2 bolus from earlier?  In any case I just felt terrible.  Wanted to just lay on the ground and nap.

I was on the phone with Diane at the time and we tossed some ideas around to how to best treat and get rolling.  Bolus called for 4u to treat that BG.  THAT would be a poor choice as my sensitivity quickly goes up when riding.  After a few minutes, we decided that a 1/2 bolus would be the best bet.  I took in 2u and waited for it drop below 250 (or, until I started to feel a bit more like myself).

At 13:44 it was down to 244, I felt like riding again, and I headed off.  Made my way along the American Tobacco Trail on my Superfly, with Lake Crabtree County Park being my destination.  A quick loop of the 7 miles there, and then back towards home.

By 14:43 my BG was down to 82, and I took in my first nutrition of 25g of Carbs via a sports bar.  Seems that the early decisions we made where spot on.

When I was on my return trip, about 6 miles from home, things got interesting.

I was at the Hwy 55, I-540 intersection when I picked up this wood screw (heck, I don't know what kind of screw it is... I am not a This Old House watcher. natch).

After unpacking my backpack for a tube and some CO2 cartridges, I realized I was not as prepared for this repair as I could have been.

I mention a lot about how endurance cycling is a lot like being a diabetic and dealing with diabetes.  Almost exactly like it.

I didn't have the right size tube for the tire, as my last ride was on my road bike.  So I unpacked the 700c 18-25 tube, took out the tubless valve stem, attached the used performance bar wrapper to the inside of the tube with a little gum, and installed the road tube.  I filled it up using the 16 gram cartridge.

Guess what?

It looked unsightly, and lumpy, but it worked.  Held air.  Rideable.  Fixed.

You may not have the fast acting of choice, or the one you are most comfortable with, if you go hypoglycemic.  You just use what you have and adapt to rectify the blood glucose.  It may change correction time, or how much of a bounce you will get.

But you make do.  You adapt.  You keep choppin.

As did I with the road tube.

I check the BG after the repair was complete and it was a picture perfect 109 at 16:09.  I actually gave a little bolus at this point as sitting for 12 minutes making the repair would certainly cause a slight incline of the BG.

Limped the bike back home to the trail head.  By the time I was there, the severely damaged tire had begun to deteriorate, and, in turn, the tube was eventually punctured.  2 or 3 miles riding on the flat.  Bike rolled on.

Just as we do with diabetes.  Everyday. Everyday.

Back at the car I shut my temp basal rate off, and tested at a 144 at 17:01 after packing up and changing my clothes.  A small 2u bolus to combat the usual post ride spike.

I had to laugh to myself as 2011 threw the last little bit it had at me.

Who knows what 2012 hold in store?  I am expecting some great things, some awesome adventures, and some fantastic victories and celebrations.  Too be sure. I imagine that things will be rough going at times.  I know they will be.

Just like life with diabetes.  You can turn the page, but the bumps continue.

I don't usually become overly bogged down with the start of a new year.

I am making an exception this year.

I am relieved that 2011 is behind me, and welcome the challenges of 2012.


 

Training Hours: Ride: 00:00 Run: 00:45 Other: 00:00

Insulin Delivery Summary:
Daily Total: 30.00 units
Bolus: 11.15u (37%)
Basal: 18.85u (63%)

Daily Carb Intake Bolused For: 12g

I believe.

I believe.

I believe.

I believe in an Angel.

I believe love conquers all.

I believe that a cure for diabetes is coming.

I believe in your strength.  I believe in the power of the bicycle as the vehicle for change.  I believe in the importance of details.  I believe in GO!  I believe, each of us, can, indeed, make a difference.  I believe in the power of the family known as the Diabetes Online Community.  I believe in myself.

I believe in Miracles.

I believe in Christmas magic.

I believe I will reach Mexico.

I believe I did not die for a reason.

I believe.

I believe.

I believe.

Did you ever just spent a minute and think... where will it end?  No. Not "rapture", the Mayan calendar, or "Nibiru".

I am talking diabetes.

I spend a large amount of time advocating for diabetes research, trying to raise awareness for people afflicted with diabetes, and trying to live in a way that promotes the ability to live a normal life regardless of being diagnosed with Type 1, Type 2, LADA, etc.  I read TONS of articles on new research that promises to one day, possibly, be the path to the cure.

With all that, to be honest, I don't spent hardly any time at all daring to think that day will come, and what it will be like.

I truly believe it is coming.  I REFUSE (staunchly) to get a diabetes related tattoo because, as I have explained more than a few times, I don't want to be "stuck with it" after I am cured.

A cure is coming.

There is no doubt.  I believe that as sure as I believe the sun with rise tomorrow. As it has for the past 4.57 billion years (give or take).

Tonight as I sat here quietly looking at some photos by Teresa Ollila (an artist whose photos I just happened upon today) I was consumed by one of a baby in a crib with a pump attached.

As I stared at it, I thought about my 34 years with Type 1.  Would this little tiny person still have diabetes in 34 years?  Will it be cured by then?  I will be 77 years old when this little one reaches that milestone.

90% of my life being spent with Type 1 diabetes.

I let myself imagine a cure coming in the next decade.  Or two.  What it would feel like to walk into the Endo office for the last time.

The last time, ever.

Get an injection, out patient surgery, whatever, and then head home.  Pump and meter detached and in a box.  Never to be used again.  I imagined this toddler's parents taking out an infusion set, and never putting a new one in.

What that day will feel like.

I wondered out loud to myself why I don't think about that day more often.  To that end I'm not really sure.  Like riding on an uphill that goes on for hours, maybe I just keep my focus a little ahead of the front wheel and make my mind go blank.

For now we just need to keep pushing towards that goal.  To work tirelessly encouraging decision makers to keep that result in focus, to raise funds for researching all possible avenues of technical advancement and cure investigation, and to keep ourselves, our bodies, as "undamaged" as possible for the day the cure is announced.

That announcement will be quickly followed (as long as it takes me to stop sobbing, dry my eyes, and collect myself), by the deleting of the Type1Rider blog, Twitter feed and Facebook page.

I. Can't. Wait.

Until then, tomorrow is another day....

We sharpen our axes tonight, and we just Keep On Choppin' tomorrow.

The other day I tweeted that "The difference between success and failure can be razor thin. Just Keep Choppin'!".


Whether one is speaking about racing, diabetes, school work, any topic really.... those words echo true.

These words are rattling through my head as I try to wrestle with my scheduling and the effects it has on my training.  It is SO tough to get everything in.  SO tough to stay motivated when tired and starting on the trainer late at night.  SO tough to keep focused and make sure everything gets done.

It can be just SO overwhelming.  That is how it is feeling right now.


I would love to quit my job, and just be able to train when the sun is up.  Get as prepared as physically possible for Tour Divide in 6 months. Just focus 5-6 hours a day on riding, running, and strength training.


Of course it doesn't work that way. 


30 minutes on the trainer, and squeezing a TRX session in the office after work are better than nothing.  That just might be the difference in July.  Just going to do what I can today, plan for a more productive tomorrow.  


Same with dealing with diabetes.  It would be great to know the carb count on everything.  To not be put into any situations that may cause your BG to waiver.  To always be able to eat at the same time, everyday. To not have the batteries fail in your meter just as you board the airplane for that 4 hour flight.  To not be stuck at a pasta place for lunch.  To have someone bring something besides donuts to that early morning meeting.


Of course it doesn't work that way.


The difference in the A1C you want, and the A1C that you got last time is measured in the smallest of increments.


Do the best your can to bolus for that donut at that meeting, and stick with more familiar and friendly foods the rest of the day.  Make that small .05 basal change to drop that "dawn phenomena" those 10mg/dLs. Test 2 times more today if you can.

Those are the little constant things that make up success while living with diabetes.  


If things don't go according to plan (um, grandma, what do you mean that apple pie WASN'T made with Splenda), don't sweat it.  Do the best you can under the circumstances and move on.  Stay focused on the big goal.  It's just a temporary number, right?

Keep choppin'! 


Just. Keep. Choppin'!


Now, where are that pile of scratch off lottery tickets I purchased......  :)

So after my incident during the Tour Divide this past year, I was riding through the wilderness along the TD race route to get to somewhere (didn't know where) to get some of treatment...

After descending the trail on Mt Shark I happened upon a closed Lodge, that, thankfully, the owners where at preparing to open for the season.  The folks where kind enough to drive me to the hospital in Canmore.

I JUST yesterday came across the name of that lodge, along with the contact email of the individual who drove me (blue Jetta TDI wagon - that I remembered) - written in black sharpie on a wet and crinkled piece of paper in some luggage.

It was the Mount Engadine Lodge.

It is the Mount Engadine Lodge.

I cannot even begin figure out how to possibly thank you enough for your hospitality and kindness.  I was in a BAD way when I got to your location, and you where all magnificent, caring, and beyond helpful.  


I'm not sure how bad things would have turned out if not for your help.


Thank you.  


Thank you.  


Thank you.

As some of you may already know, I have spent the majority of this week in Rochester, MN on a work related trip.  It has been a weird week in the fact that although I was only there for 4 days, it feels like I have been gone for so, so much more.  A lot has seemed to have happened while I was away.

One of the things I noticed while in Rochester, was that I was missing home more than I usually would for such a short trip.  I basically like traveling and enjoy meeting new people and experiencing new regions and cultures.  It doesn't usually bother me to sleep somewhere else, use a different shower, or have to forage a bit for food.

Something was definitely missing on this trip however.

It was in the hours (and hours) that we idled waiting for network connections and server boots that it dawned on me what was wrong.

The whole time I was in Rochester, I only saw 1 bicycle.

Uno.

Granted to is the beginning of December, but there should be a few hearty souls communing in Rochester proper between the University of Minnesota, the Mayo Clinic, and the respective apartment complexes.

But, the roads and street poles where strangely devoid of two wheeled pedaled transportation.

Weird both in how the lack of cycles, and in how much I noticed it.

I was pretty happy to be getting to Rochester International Airport to begin my trip home.  Figured I would be able to FaceTime with Diane for a good bit and catch up on the day, before boarding the plane.

However, the TSA had slightly different plans for me as I was VERY delayed getting through security with my diabetes related items - my attached insulin pump, along with the spare pods, syringes, and insulin pen I had in my bag.  I have never had an issue flying in and out of major metro areas like Boston, NY, Raleigh, Atlanta, etc.

It seems, since Rochester is such a TINEY airport, the TSA officials stated they had simply never seen one before and didn't know what to do.

After about 20 minutes they figured it out, and I was finally able to go about my travels.

As I am cruising at 36000ft I am simply looking forward to getting home.

I am deeply missing Diane's calming voice, beautiful smile, and soft eyes.

I am anxious to sleep in my own bed, and snack in my own kitchen.

And, I will be happy to see a host of bicycles leaning up against the walls in my apartment.